Secular or non-religious godparents
First published in the Oct/Nov 2011 issue of Mother & Baby magazine. Interview with NSW celebrant Wendy Hayes author of ‘How to be an inspiring Godparent, Mentor, Guardian’.
You can choose the people you’d like to be the godparents of your child, “many people believe that it is safest to elect a relative as they are bound by ties of blood but you might find that someone outside of the family can offer a different perspective,” says Wendy. “Things to consider are the person’s reliability, their beliefs and whether or not they have the time and desire to be part of the process.”
Whether you choose family members or close friends, it is worth taking the time to think about the role you’d like the godparent to play in your child’s life. While godparents rarely have any legal responsibilities, the people that you choose are committing to a lifelong involvement with your family and they need to feel comfortable with this. It’s a good idea to sit down with the people you’ve chosen to chat about your expectations and their understanding of the role. If you’re having a christening in a church, check what the minister or priest requires of the godparents, as you may need to discuss these prior to the day.
Playing the role
If you’ve been asked to be a godparent, you’re occupying a special place in your godchild’s life. Being a good godparent isn’t rocket science, but taking an interest in the role is generally appreciated. “A good godparent is there for the child in a loving and caring way and offers support, friendship and a gentle push in the right direction as they get older,” says Wendy.
In days gone by, the chosen adults would have been expected to have consistent involvement in the day-to-day lives of their godson or goddaughter’s life, monitoring their spiritual development and ensuring they stay on the straight and narrow. Expectations have since changed, but regular contact and a general willingness to be involved in the child’s life now the acceptable norm. “Take your godchild for an outing or take them for an ice cream, simply spending time together works a treat,” says Wendy. Becoming a ‘third’ parent to a godchild can be a wonderfully rewarding, not to mention fun experience. You’ll also get first dibs on the delicious cake served after the formalities are finished!
First published in the Oct/Nov 2011 issue of Mother & Baby magazine. Interview with NSW celebrant Wendy Hayes author of ‘How to be an inspiring Godparent, Mentor, Guardian’.
Humanist godparents
Humanists don’t pray to a god but value the life of every human being. They often have a naming ceremony to celebrate a new life and the love of the parents. Friends and relatives gather to offer good wishes for the child and amongst the festivities there may be readings of poetry and songs as celebration.
Most families choose to appoint adults to play a significant role in their child’s life; indeed that’s often one of the main reasons people have opted to hold a naming ceremony in the first place.